"Bubbly" Bath

Did you know Marilyn Monroe once took a bath in champagne?
350 bottles of it.

I suppose it's wasteful, but... I'd really like to do that.

What are the terribly indulgent things you've always wanted to do?

Pillowtalk

This might sound a little scandalous, but it's innocent, I promise.

I love bed time. I love being cozy in my bed. PJ's. Reading, or doing a crossword puzzle. And most of the time... I really love sharing my bed.

Yeah, that's the part I knew you would think was scandalous.

But really, it's just nice to share the whole bed time experience with someone- regardless of whether they're a platonic or romantic friend. I love to share my favorite bed time book- Eloise in the Plaza. Or take turns reading the words of my dear friends Mr. Cummings or Ms. Browning. Just talk and be warm.

Rudy (or Rudolfo the Pooh), my aunt's jack russel/pug/chihuahua, spent last weekend with me. I let him sleep in my bed. He gets as close to me as possible, then curls up like a potato bug and doesn't move all night. It's so endearing, and helped take the edge off of the loneliness. This is his bed time picture. He loves blankets, being warm, and cuddling, just like me.

I've always been a terrible sleeper- I just lay there and worry. I think sometimes it helps to just have someone there, to know someone is at peace in my presence. It inspires me to calm down and sleep, myself.

That's what I'm missing most right now. I'd like to say goodnight to someone.

Texas hold... let 'em go.

Regarding my relationship.

Or end of relationship. My best friend summed it up like this- "You went all in. And you lost."

That's exactly how it went. Except for one small thing. This whole time, I thought we were playing on a team. Together. Now I know it was exactly the opposite.

When you bet everything you have, and lose it all, the very worst thing someone can do is ask if you want to play another hand. They don't even realize you have nothing left. They've taken everything, and still assume you're going to come up with more to throw in. You've been holding on for so long, one more hand, and another, and another. And after awhile they don't think you'll ever give up. That's when people start taking advantage. They can't believe it when you finally walk away.

Here's the thing about gambling. You never know who's going to hustle you. You just hope it's not the person you love.

Excess

Excess weight comes in many forms. It's found on the body. Or in a home filled with things- a bookshelf that needs to be filtered through, an extra chair that crowds the room. It's found in the form of a person who lets you give all of your love, time, promises, yet withholds theirs.
It starts to build up. Time flies by, and suddenly you realize you've gained 30 pounds, acquired clutter, and spent years giving priority to people who are emotionally unavailable. A life full of things that keep you occupied, but don't actually fulfill.
These situations don't just occur on their own. They happen when you don't want to believe what's actually going on. You have to recognize the signs and deal with them early on. Cut your calories after you gain the first couple pounds. Clean out your closet. Say goodbye after the first promise is not kept. That's the easy way.
When you don't accept it in the beginning, it's just your own fault for letting it happen. Excess weight doesn't go away by itself- you have to make the decision. And at that point, all you can do is go forward. Learn how to avoid the same mistakes next time.

2 months ago I began giving away my clothes and counting my calories. Today I am 10 pounds lighter, not counting the clothes I got rid of.
In another month or two I will have no excess weight left, in any form.
Although I might keep my hair long.

Jupiter

Here's the thing about being a Sagittarius in a relationship- we are known for being loyal and adventurous. We are the only sign which has both of these qualities; every other sign possesses only one.
When we get in deep enough, I think it's just the sheer idea of not being able to see an exit sign from where we're sitting that terrifies us.
We're also known for expecting too much from people, and then getting bored when they don't meet our expectations. I read things like this and think it sounds pretty spot on, and then I think... goodness, what a pain in the ass.
They say Sagittarians are really only meant for each other. Sometimes I think that's true, and then other times I don't know how there would ever be room for two of me in a relationship. I'd probably run away.
I think the most someone like me can really hope for is to find a person who, instead of needing to escape from me, will escape with me.

Mirrors

My best friend is visiting from San Fransisco. Since she moved, we've gone as much as a whole year without seeing each other. When we do, though, it's like she never left. True friendships really do stand the test of time and distance. We discussed our appearances a lot, and as she regaled me with her stories of weight gain and loss, hair colors and cuts, I realized she's never looked any different to me- just beautiful.
I saw an old voice teacher a couple days ago, and the connection we once had was so broken that I hardly recognized her. It was like the time I spent with her never even happened- I'd spent far more time repairing the emotional damage from that relationship than reaping the benefits of what she taught me. After two years of reflection and growth on my part, she looked like a completely different person to me.
Do your visual perceptions of people change as your relationships do? Mine certainly do, in a big way. As I grow to love someone, their flaws slowly disappear, and they just simply look beautiful to me. It works the other way too though- sometimes what I once saw as beautiful turns into a flaw. Lovely blond hair suddenly looks too bright, merely a distraction from more meaningful subjects.
There is someone in my life who I feel has stopped seeing my beauty. They glide over my joy and consistently arrive at my mistakes, my negativity. As I continue spending more and more time with this person, I wonder if I'll begin to see myself in that way. I don't know if it's just a stage they're going through, or if I'm merely being too sensitive. Or, if it's true and does in fact continue, will it cause me to lose my love for myself?
There is a lot to be said for surrounding yourself with people who love you. Make sure they really do see you in a positive light, because it's easy to start to see their image as your own reflection.

Solitaire

I've lived all by myself for over one year now.
I adore it.
As of next week, I will no longer be living alone. It's a good thing for both parties involved, but I must say how important I think it is for every individual to live by themselves at some point in their lives.
Over the last year, I've come to one great realization- I actually enjoy my own company. Because, well, I'm awesome. One or two nights a week, I cook myself a nice dinner, drink a glass of wine, and enjoy a romantic comedy with myself. Sometimes, if I drink enough wine, I'll just wander around the condo as if it's my palace. I'm the proud owner of many ball gowns, and play dress up more often than you might think a 25-year-old would.
It's the little things I love, too- like right now I'm sitting on my bed in my underpants, eating cheese. And yes, drinking wine. Again. Can I still do these things when there is someone here to witness them? Will they just judge me for consuming too much cheese and wine? And never wearing pants?
I think maybe that's where many co-habitations take a wrong turn- one or all parties feel like they need to hide their true colors to appear normal. We all know that ship has already sailed for me, so I figure why not just let it all hang out?
I've basically decided that, besides closing the door when I pee now, I'm just going to own it.

You want to live with me? Then you better be ready to live with me! Bring it.